I commit to making decisions about my life, based on what I think is good for me. This does not mean I will cease to take into account the advice or experience stories of others. I will listen to that advice and those stories. I will, however, make the decision based on what I want and not what another may wish me to do.
I will seek support without trying to give over responsibility. I will ask for help when I need it.
I will stop trying to get others to make decisions for me. I will learn to notice when I am trying to do this (by telling sob stories, implying that making this particular decision is too hard, and so forth), and I will break that habit.
I will stop letting my desire to “fix” others distract me from attending to myself. I will learn the difference between helping and doing things for people. Problems look simpler from the outside.
I commit to taking action to make my life better for me. I will learn to notice when I am procrastinating and “studying for life” instead of living it. I will set deadlines for myself on research and decision-making and I will stick to them.
I will develop and decide on my own scales for what is “enough,” “necessary,” and “success.” and I will learn how to answer to people who would like me to use their scales instead of mine.
I commit to facing my fear of failure, as well as my fear of success. I will consciously learn to accept that failure is part of learning, and not let the fear prevent me from trying things that I want to do.
I will forgive myself for making mistakes, and learn to stop the spiral of negative self-talk that keeps me from progressing toward my goals. I will learn to learn from my mistakes, and then move forward rather than ruminating and castigating myself for not being perfect.
I will no longer let uncertainty whether I can “do it right” prevent me from trying things.
I will accept that change requires stepping outside my comfort zone, being afraid and doing it anyway. I will move beyond being afraid of being afraid.
I will remember to praise myself for courage, and comfort myself when that courage fails. I will set time limits on how long I may take to comfort myself, and when that time is up I will get back on the horse. I will try again tomorrow.
I will remember to take pride in my accomplishments instead of telling myself that “It doesn’t count” or “Anyone could have done that.” I did it. It doesn’t matter if it was original (copyright issues excepted) or if someone else could have done the same.
I will not use initial failure as an excuse that it is not worth continuing to try.
I will stop using “that looks difficult” as an excuse to not do things.
I will work toward consciously accepting that change involves giving up things I like, and taking on other things I don’t like. I will be suspicious of free lunches, and not waste time on things which promise to improve my life without any actual effort.
I will give up the idea that I can change all at once, fix everything, know everything. I will replace it with the acceptance of incremental change. I will learn not to set unreasonable deadlines.
I will periodically ask myself if my current activity is something that moves me closer to my goals, or a distraction/procrastination technique to avoid doing that work.
I commit to identifying and eliminating habits of thought, action, or inaction that hold me back from making positive changes.
I am going to take responsibility for my life.